Blog, Body Image, Diary

Being your own Valentine

February 15, 2012


I’m kind of Meh about this so called Lovers Day but who am I to deprive the boy of an opportunity to buy me a gift or some flowers 😛

I do think it’s stupid that we have a whole day to point out that being single isn’t normal, in the name of higher sales figures of course.

It’s stupid enough that people wonder why you’re single, like what’s your major flaw or you’re so cute, how can you be single? Bleh.

On a daily basis, we’re told that finding The One is the most important thing (apart from being pretty but that’s linked to The One too). It’s in our TV shows, movies, music, it’s on magazine covers: Find your soul mate and you’ll live happily ever after.

So, in between all the girlfriends/ wives comparing V day stories and the ‘forever alone’ tweets, remember that being single isn’t about waiting for the next The One. Being single is about being strong, independent and having a choice. It’s about You being enough for you. It’s about happiness on your own standards.

And being in a relationship isn’t about having someone ‘complete’ you. It’s not about someone loving and validating you while you don’t do the same to yourself. Yeah we all crave human companionship and affection, but it’s nothing unless you give yourself the same love and respect as you would expect from that special someone. It really doesn’t matter if you’re single or not. Love comes in so many forms and relationships that it’s stupid to pin this one relationship above being a parent, friend or sister.

I can’t believe we have a day to celebrate how much this other person loves us or how much we love this person, but there’s no day to celebrate how much we love ourselves. Says something about our society, don’t you think?






  • Maimusings

    Weesha I heart you!! My fave post on this blog ever. I couldnt have said this better myself.

  • so well put.

  • Deedeefresh

    can i hear a hallelujer and an amen!!!!

  • So true, even though I declared Valentines Day to the Day of Love, no meter which love. But I absolutly agree with what you said about "the big search". We are always so much focusing on finding that special someone that is our true love and the one we will be with forever, that we sometimes forget all the other relations that give us love. 

  • HPS

    Your last part about not having a day to celebrate ourselves is on point!  We should start one!  As for today I'm single and honestly I don't feel today is any different from the next and that's a great feeling to have.  I'm at a point in my life where the concept of being single in the traditional sense isn't a big deal for me anymore because I am so content in who I am and others judgements of that don't mean shit.

  • You are totes right. I sent a Vday card but didn't get one back… but wasn't expecting to (although I guess I vaguely hoped for a surprise) because we both feel just like you do. So I settled for a little card, but try to show love/affection/care every day like you 🙂 xo

  • joolz

    i concur, as a long married person, I feel uncomfortable about the emphasis on over-hyped romantic love, which is not the best basis for a relationship, and I really do agree that self-love is the best love of all, Whitney sang it the best! 

  • Love.This.Post!!! I agree we should look for validation within ourselves instead of relationships. As the song says "learning to love yourself is the greatest love of all!!!"

  • Great inspirational quotes here! i feel like single people hate vday but as soon as they become a couple they are all for it. I am sure I will hate vday if I ever became single again.  PDA makes me sick haha

    -Bianca at