Blog, Body Image, Diary

If I had to leave you a letter..

September 16, 2011

 

tumblr_kybm5lRJ6o1qb8suso1_400

Dear world,

I’m so full of happiness for finally reaching a stage of self acceptance and love, after years of eating disorders, depression and self loathing. Why do you insist on knocking me down with every word, image, tv show and joke? Why do you treat me like I am alien, incapable of ever being loved or considered beautiful, sexy and amazing? Why do you hate and judge me so much when there are far more inexcusable things to hate in this world, like people who judge merely by appearances or people who have more value for money than life, people and ethics.

How does hating so much on fat people make the world a better place?

Dear mom,

You don’t know what it’s like to be me and I’ve accepted that you will never know. Why can’t you accept me as I am? does it really matter what everyone rates your daughter on a scale of prettiness? do you really think no man will love her just the way she is? Do I really have to be successful, smart, independent, happy and thin? “You’re pretty even though you’re fat” “I’m so happy for you, now you only have to lose weight” like my failure to be thin trumps my independence and career.

Dear friends,

I know I’m your friend but listening to you complain about your body or bitch about someone else’s affects me too. It’s contagious because while you’re bitching about how fat your thighs are or beaming with pride about your weight loss, I’m wondering what you think about me since I’m about ten times bigger than you.

If you choose to knock yourself down instead of fighting all these rules that society puts on women, don’t expect a self acceptance/ plus size blogger to support you or offer a shoulder to lean on. I’m sorry, it might be selfish but it’s too destructive for me to be a part of. I can be there for you when you realize you are SO much better than that!

tumblr_lkv1yvfhEP1qdegtso1_400

Dear boyfriend,

I love you, you make me forget how shitty the world can be and some how manage to make me feel like a beautiful, sexy woman everyday, every minute. I wish there were more of you to negate all the ass holes a plus size, or a every girl for that matter, has cried over.

Dear Plus size girls,

Own it. You don’t need to explain your body to anyone, it’s YOUR body.  I am constantly saying the words “Fuck People” in my head because it’s too hard to live everyday trying to live up to other people’s expectations. It’s too hard living with other people’s judgment. It’s too hard caring about what other people think because honestly, I doubt they think, I think they just act on what everyone else thinks and enjoy judging people (everyone does!) but at the end of the day, it’s your life. You will never be able to please everyone else so you might as well please yourself. Live your life as if it’s always going to be your last day, stand up for yourself and make an effort to love every curve, lump, pimple, etc. Your life will be better, I promise.

Love-Quotes1-300x225

Dear bloggers,

Continue staying true to yourself because you are awesome. Blog from your heart, blog for the love of it, blog to over power the voices of biased fashion magazines, movies and tv shows, etc. Blog for those who are like you and need to know it’s fine not to be somebody else’s definition of perfect. Always keep blogging because you inspire your readers in a way you can’t imagine.

Dear Lu,

Work hard to focus on the positive, kick the negative out of your life. Live your life like it might end tomorrow, give your future kids something to be proud of. Try to make a difference some how and go beyond a self involved world, your problems suck less when you focus on others. Accept and move on, grow and change. There’s nothing you can do to change the past, work harder on the present and future. It’s ok to be proud of how far you’ve come 🙂

Love and hugs,

weesha_thumb

Comments

comments

  • ohh i saw this post right now and it really inspires me.

    well i am not that big (still in a normal weight) but i've gained almost 10 kg (i think round about 20 lbs) in the last three or four months and feel terrible. but the thing is that i also felt fat with 10 kg less.

    i have had a mix of anorexia, bulimia and binge eating. atm the binge eating overweight.

    but i am looking for inspiration to learn to love myself again (woth or without the weight) and this post really motivates me to fight for it!

  • Michelle Miller

    hi weesha, i've stalked your blog for a long time and figured it was about time i left a comment. i think you're an amazing chick and i wish there were more people like you around 🙂

  • Yara

    <3 is all I feel after every one of your blog posts 🙂

  • Aagain such a wonderful post. Fuck the people and fuck the world, sometimes it is so hard to say so, but in the end it is the right way, even if there will always be stones in our way. It is a lot easier to just give a fuck and jump over them, than to try your best to pick them up and put them out of your way. No one need to explain why she or he chooses to live the life she or he does, no metter if it is about your body, your religion, your lifestyle, your sexuality or what ever. It is always just about us and what we do with our life.

  • Amen, girl!

  • H Hallani

    Perfectly said!  FULL STOP

  • Rikkchen

    Yet again, I fall in love with you and your amazing, honest, creative and sensitive mind. We're so in sync, it's not even funny. I love this! I love you! Thanks for being such an incredible woman. I really hope I get the chance to give you an enormous hug one day. 

    xoxo Rikke
    http://stickysweetdanish.blogspot.com

  • Anita Riot

    such a great post! love it. thanks for sharing, i agree and am with you on it all! i feel like i wrote this. its exactly my thoughts and what I've been saying and wanting to say to all of these people..thanks! 

    xo
    A_riot
    http://www.thickthreads.net

  • Susanna Porob

    Such a brilliant post. I love the way you've spoken the hearts of all us plus (and proud of it) sized girls. More power to ya!

  • Natália V.

    I think you're beautiful, and yes, you helped me to accept myself the way I am … not just accept but want to be exactly the way I am. Today I am a happier person thanks to blogs plus size. Nice post, perfect words, congratulations

  • Very poignant post, I love it. you had me at the 'Dear Body' letter. All you wrote is so True. We need to love our bodies the way they are. I feel bad for the parents of my grand-daughters….trying to raise them in a world that sees only outer beauty.

  • Rebecca Ndawana

    These letters are all so beautiful and inspiring…. i actually had tears in my eyes. they are so honest and filled with exactly what i think mall the time too…… BEAUTIFUL

  • Your tenacious spirit is inspiring, especially to someone like me who struggles with body image issues brought on by society's obsession with skinny girls. It's taken me a long while, but I think I'm done with trying to live up to other people's expectations of me. I've come across many bloggers such as yourself who are extremely positive and encouraging, and I want to thank you for that. Reading your blog inspires me to be comfortable in my own skin, cos' that's all I've got. In fact, I've even set up my own blog because of this. I want to be the change that I want to see in this world.

    I feel that in my home-country (Malaysia), diversity in body shapes is discouraged. We are constantly bombarded with advertisements about slimming centers and weight loss pills, it's crazy. Conversations often revolve around weight and stupid diets. I can't eat a slice of cake without someone else trying to make me feel guilty about it. So once again, thanks for being such an inspiration. 🙂

  • I love this post. You're amazing. I wish more people thought like you.

  • Guest

    Darn it! There it goes with my full name again, would you mind removing these comments, doll?

  • Guest

    Firstly, your new(ish) header is fierce, and I just adore it!
    And those letters were all so well said. I especially loved the one to your fellow bloggers!

  • Beautiful post Lu! I love you & your blog, it's real and uplifting! Keep pushing forward sweetie! 🙂 <3

  • Rubyleonne

    Wonderful and heartfelt letters! Continue to be a light in this dim world!! LOVE IT!!!!
    xoxo
    Janelle (Ruby Leonne)

  • Bonkasaurus

    Weesha you are so sweet. My mom is exactly like your mom, but hers goes, "you would be so pretty if you just like 10 lbs" everyone is going to be critical about everything whether it is your size, grades, hair color, skin color; people are just too hard to please and everyone wants the world to think they are perfect.

    Congratulations! and keep on keeping on.

    -Bianca at http://theinbetweengirls.wordpress.com/

  • Skyroxy

    Weesha,  I LOVE this post, and we must be channeling each other, because I am sitting here with my plus size self in a cute bathing suit and thinking, no one is keeping me out of the pool this year because I am buying into their crap. 

    I have a bracelet that is engraved "you don't define me, I define myself" That is a tough one, but I'm working on it. 

    Thanks for this post.
    Lesa
    Always Summer

  • Eb Galerie Art

    i agree with your post.It's injust.Life is injust.But you're fantastic.You make me soo nice when i see your post., i was thin, and now i am not fat but with curves.CURVES ARE BEAUTIFUL.DIFFERENCE ARE BEAUTIFUL.  Bye.

  • I just discovered your blog and I am so happy that I did. This post spoke to me and I am going to use the lessons in it to make me a happier person.

  • Anais Leitedebastos

    Very nice article. Your blog is really good. You are a beautiful woman (both internally and externally.) Continue please. With love, Anaïs

  • pri

    I discovered your blog just today and from what I've seen, you have nothing to be ashamed about! You are a GODDESS (and I mean that!)! Here's some of my inspiration for you:

    http://www.youtube.com/user/jernet
    http://xoxonettap.com/
    http://www.youtube.com/user/UglyFaceOfBeauty